Nowwwwww this is a story all about how my life got flip turned upside down, I’d like to take a minute just sit right there, I’ll tell you how I become the Fresh queen of chemo…
In West Somerset, born and raised, the nail salon was where I spent most of my days, chilling out Max, relaxing all cool, shooting some glitter all over nails, when a couple of tumours, who were up to no good starting making trouble in my neighbourhood, I started one massive fight and yes I scared, but that’s how I became the queen of chemo hair 🙌🏻🙌🏻
Ok so I’m not a poet BUT I can be freakin’ hilarious. Also I totally used the word ‘fight’ in my Fresh Prince re write but in truth I hate that word. Along with a lot of others…’Beat this’ ‘Fight this’ ‘Don’t let it win’
Because essentially if you don’t ‘win’ you’ve lost like its a game. I feel like the word fighting makes you feel like you havn’t ‘tried’ hard enough and that in itself is so, almost patronising? And I swear to god I’m trying.
Anyway I digress, today I wanted to talk about Chemotherapy, about the effects physically and emotionally.
Being honest and open has helped my journey. And I really hope that I can help others too. Understanding is a huge part, and I guess it’s because people see cancer and chemotherapy as a taboo subject. How do you talk to someone and ask those questions.
I have had a few messages from people asking what it’s like as loved ones have had it but they never felt like they could ask them how they really feel.
So here I am…ask away
There is always that one drink isn’t there, that you had WAY too much of once and you can never look at it without feeling a bit sick. That’s how I feel about chemo. And truth be told it’s very much like having alcohol. Although I would like to think if you spent £16k on a bottle of Champagne it would have much more of a glorious feeling 😂
In fact the whole chemo process I describe as like a hangover. You feel hungry but sick, tired and sluggish. Never wanting to touch the stuff again
Even the process Is like a night out. I start feeling joyous and bouncy and then proceed to drink slowly over 6 hours. I go in sober, come our chemo drunk.
Steroids are given to start and these are to help the other drugs work better. Anti sickness etc but these again are hard to take. Gives me the ‘someone walking over your grave’ shivers.
They also taste horrible as they go in this metallic numbing taste.
As soon as I’m out I need to sleep, I feel quite ‘cloudy headed’, a bit floaty a bit unreal.
Side effects come on slowly. My tatsebuds go. Everything tastes so horrible like drinking orange juice straight after brushing your teeth and this lasts for about three days.
My ears pop too, like im underwater I just want to shake my head clear.
Sleeping is another problem altogether. The nature of steroids is that they keep you awake. So your so tired but you can’t sleep, can’t shut off.
I’m lucky that I havnt had too many physical side effects. I’m super sensitive to the sun. So factor 50 and St Moritz for life 😂 but the rest of my skin has been good. I can’t stomach strong smells, perfumes, air fresheners etc. And I do get terrible ulcers but my body could have been a lot worse.
What I have learnt is that every time is different. Again like drinking you can never predict. I now understand I have to just go with the flow. Take each day and don’t expect too much of myself.
The worse thing in all of this? The guilt of being away from my babies, knowing for three days I’m just not stable enough.
But please, we as a county need to TALK. Talk about treatment about how it affects people around us. Understand so we can offer help.
I hope I made you smile with my rap. My honesty. Now I’m going to rest in my chemo hangover.
✌🏻 love Lisa xxx